…아프지말고. (그게 말이 돼? pt.4)

It’s May, and the yearly school festivals are back in town. In Korea, schools (especially big universities) have a culture of holding yearly festivals for their students. Usually in universities, there will be booths, street food, drinking tents, lots of alcohol, club parties, and the highlight–famous artists invited to perform during evenings. It’s a fun time for students, but that doesn’t actually stop the teachers from giving an extra load of assignments while ironically wishing everyone, “Have fun and enjoy the festival!”

Oddly, that week involved a bit of drama…

…and the drama continues.

Continued from Does that make sense? (그게 말이 돼? pt. 3)

그게 말이 돼? (Nonsense…)


pt. 4

…아프지말고. (…and stop hurting.)

Friday, May 19, 2017

That night, I went to the concert area and found that there were already a lot of people–especially high school students in uniforms. I guess GFRIEND is really that popular… I wandered around, wondering if I could spot Adji, but there was a lot of people so I didn’t know how I was supposed to find her. Either way, I really don’t care. I’m going to have fun tonight whether or not I see her anyway.

Before the event started, there was some sort of singing contest on stage for the university students. I honestly didn’t care much. As good as that one contestant was, she totally got the lyrics of Adele’s “Hello” wrong for a lot of the parts, but Koreans wouldn’t know, so I guess that didn’t really matter.

After some time, I walked through the crowd and spotted Adji doing the same thing just in front of me. I quickly shifted through people and managed to grab her arm and she was surprised to see me. “Nina! I how did you find me?”

“I saw you.”

From then on we stood together. But then time, she seemed more fired up. She was determined to squeeze through the packed open area to get to the front. I was uncomfortable, because I hate forcing myself into the smallest spaces. I hate having to stand so close to people I don’t know, and I am absolutely mortified by the thought of being skin-to-skin with strangers in all directions. I’m not claustrophobic or anything; I just hate being in closed spaces with people in them. When GFRIEND came on stage, everyone went insane. The fans were all trying to get a look and pushing forward. I was squeezed in such a tiny, awkward space, and there was pressure on all sides that I could not move. It felt mentally and physically painful to be constricted like this. During the previous concert, people weren’t pushing so hard and I still had a bit of space. I guess since this time we were kind of situated a bit farther back, everyone in that area had a hard time seeing anything so everyone was pushing and struggling to see anything. Even Adji was trying to squeeze through the crowd and pulling me with her but there is no use, and I really didn’t want to force myself.

Needless to say, I barely saw GFRIEND at all. I just got to hear their songs on loud speaker and I’m not even a big fan or their songs. The fandom was screaming fan chants everywhere, and I can hear high school girls saying, “하나도 안 보인다…” (I cannot see anything…) Yeah, me too. I tried taking videos by holding my phone up, but most of the videos sucked. From time to time I was able to take glimpses of a certain GFRIEND member’s face (her name is 엄지/Umji; I looked it up lol), so every time I see them on MNet, I remember her as “the only girl that I remember from the concert.”


I really didn’t see much of the other members except her so I have clear memories of her face from that night. She has really cute cheeks. I want to squeeze them. Also, she kinda looks like my friend/classmate 주사려 now that I think about it… 😛 Both have chubby cheeks and big round eyes. I’m never telling 사려 that though. She’ll think I’m stupid hahaha

By the way, when I looked up Umji on google, it seemed like people once referred to her as the “ugly member” of GFRIEND. SERIOUSLY PEOPLE??? I don’t even know her, and I’m not even a fan of GFRIEND, but I thought she was cute! Plus, she’s like a teenager (and apparently 막내 of their group). Gosh, stop harassing her. She’s not ugly.

Anyway, as a bonus, here’s a photo of GFRIEND that 종언 sent me, because apparently, he was right in front at that time just to see some pretty girls. 역시 우리 종언…


After GFRIEND left, the fandom left as well, giving us opportunity to make our way up to the very front. Wow. It was amazing to see the stage this close. If only Red Velvet… here I go again. I can’t stop thinking about Red Velvet and the visual “slayage” of my ReVel babies…

The next artist was 이바다 and she was kind of unknown around these parts. Everyone was just staring at her awkwardly, and she was staring back at us awkwardly and making funny awkward remarks so it was very awkward but enjoyable at the same time. You can hear whispers of people just waiting for Eddy Kim to come out soon, but I enjoyed her performance. She wasn’t bad at all. She’s one of those indie R&B artists like DEAN, etc. and her songs are really unique and cool. Her music was like the cool, underground stuff you’ll find in SoundCloud. She just had a really awkward stage presence and she’s also pretty new so I bet only real hipsters would know about her.

She sang this song at the concert and it was actually pretty good.

When Eddy Kim stood on stage, everyone was screaming. I honestly didn’t know how he looks like before I saw him that night, but when I saw him, I thought, he’s the perfect 교회 오빠 cliche. He’s good-looking, neat, sweet, has a warm voice, and he has a guitar. If that doesn’t scream 교회 오빠, I don’t know what does. (교회 오빠 literally translates to “Church Oppa.” It refers to sweet-looking, clean-cut boys who carry around an acoustic guitar. It really doesn’t even matter if they go to church or not.)

Literally everyone started fangirling/fanboying over him. Even the manly dudes were screaming. Everyone thought he was handsome. All the girls near me were saying, “와 잘 생겼다!” He’s really good at playing guitar and his voice is amazing as well so I’m really impressed.

Here are some of the videos I took from the concert:

During one of the last songs, confetti showered over us and Eddy ran right in front of the barrier between the stage and the audience and touched people’s hands. I guess, my arms are pretty short because I didn’t really get to touch him.

Also he made everyone hold up their phones on flashlight setting so that there was a beautiful sea of lights through the open area. It was so cool. The night ended well, and I thought it was amazing.

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Today, we had a make-up class for that “novel subject.” But it was cancelled. It was pretty annoying. Why did she have to send us a text message at exactly 3:00 pm (the time when the class was supposed to start)? Why can’t that professor just tell us in advance that it was going to be cancelled? It was a total waste of time.

Anyway, I rode my bike to get to that class and arrived right on time. When I got there I saw Adji and I was about to say hi, but she oddly did not make eye contact with me. At first I just brushed it off thinking, oh she’s just not in the mood to talk probably. So I went on with my day. We don’t really have common classes on Tuesdays so I didn’t see her for the rest of the day.

When I arrived for my final class that afternoon (4:30 pm), I went to my usual spot next to 유가요. She was chatting with 한소 and 왕신양 (whom were both sitting behind us) in Chinese, and as usual, I just sat there not understanding what they were saying. A minute or so later, 가요 faced me and asked, “오늘 아드지 만났어?” (Did you meet Adji today?)

“아까 보강 갈 때 봤는데,” (I saw her earlier on the way to the make-up class.) I told her.

“아드지 괜찮았어?” (Is she okay?) 가요 asked.

Then I thought for a second. She did seem like she ignored me earlier so I thought maybe she was still mad at me, but didn’t we already conclude that fight? Or is this about something else? Why is 유가요 asking me if Adji is okay? Then I remembered something. Last night after the concert ended, Adji dragged me into the beer tents (there’s a beer tent for each school department) but I kept insisting that I wanted to go home. I told her I didn’t really want to meet 선배s I didn’t know. Besides, everyone’s drinking there… So she gave in to me and let me go home. Is she mad about that now???

“봤는데 눈 안 맞추주고, 내가 ‘안녕’ 하려고 했는데–” (I saw her but she didn’t make eye contact with me. I was about to say “hi” though.)

Then 유가요 cut me off with her reaction. “아… 진짜? 하.. 와…” She seemed upset and then she turned back to 한소 and 신양 and spoke in Chinese, probably telling them what I just told her.

“왜?” (Why?) I asked her.

Then 가요 told me that she met Adji earlier in the morning after our first class, but she did not greet her or said hi because it seemed like Adji wasn’t in the mood either. So she just went on her way. But then just before coming to our last class, she was confronted by Adji asking, “Why didn’t you greet me earlier?” Of course, poor 가요 couldn’t answer, because really, there is no definite answer…

And then 가요 was like, “그리고 지난 주 금요일에 아드지 기분이 않 좋잖아.” (Also, last Friday, Adji wasn’t in a good mood.)

“아 진짜? 그게… 나 사실 그 때 몰랐어.” (Really? Actually, I didn’t know it at that time.) And yeah, I really didn’t notice it much at that time, but just like what I wrote on my previous post, I just found out later that day that she was angry with me because of her phone call.

Before I could explain everything, class started and we had to shut up and listen to our favorite 교수, 최보선 교수님. (She’s the professor who sounds like Red Velvet Wendy when she’s talking. I have 3 classes with her as the professor so I see her often.)

After class, 유가요 and I went out to talk to each other about it and just concluded that Adji was just acting pretty strange.

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

I finished my English class without having to make any contact with Adji or 유가요. When I arrived in the “novel class,” I saw that my seat was already occupied by someone else. Of course, I was dumbfounded. It’s my seat. Then I realized whose bag it was that was placed on my seat–유가요’s. 가요 entered class and told me she didn’t want to sit next to Adji today because she was intimidated by her. 한소 also went to sit beside 조문흔 at a different row so she wouldn’t have to deal with the drama either. Then 가요 asked me, “Can you sit beside me? I really don’t want anyone else to sit next to me.” Of course I said yes, but instead of feeling honoured to have been asked this question, I just felt slightly awful. What in the world is going on? Can’t we all just move on and be friends again? There’s this tension and we don’t even know what is causing it!

Before class started, I went to the water dispenser outside of our classroom and saw Adji walking toward the classroom. At that point, I thought I should test it out and see if she was still in a bad mood. So I made sure she saw me and I waved at her. And contrary to how I thought she would react (ignore me) she smiled widely and greeted me the way she usually did. “Hi Sofie!” (She calls me “Sofie” because she insists that it sounds cuter than Nina.)

I immediately ran back to 유가요 and told her, “아드지 오늘 기분이 좋아 보이던데.” (Adji seems to be in a good mood today.)

“진짜? 그래도 무서워.” (Really? Still, I’m scared.)

When Adji came to take her seat, she looked at us and asked, “Why did you change seats?” We didn’t answer, and she just ignored it.

For the rest of that dumb class, we went on to fill fake resumes that would describe our goals for the future, but nobody really took it seriously. I mean, not all of us have real future goals, including myself, so what’s the point really. At this point I really have no idea what I want to do with my life. I just resolved to ride with whatever God’s tide takes me. Like if He still wants me to become a rockstar (which I highly doubt He does, but at some point I might get an opportunity–we never know) I’ll gladly be a rockstar. If he wants me to be a writer, maybe He’ll finally give me enough inspiration to finish something. Or if He wants me to do some boring office job, sure. All I know is that I’m trying my best right now, and it’s really not easy to even live in the present. If I even bother with the future, I will totally stress myself out so I really don’t worry about my future job yet. I have a lot of work to do right now so I don’t have brain space for all that future stuff.

Anyway, while we were working on it, Adji kept asking me stuff and talking to me about that stupid activity, but she never talked to 유가요. At this point I was confused. On the way to the next class, I had to ride my bike and 가요 walked with her friend. Adji also had a bike and we took the same path so we got to talk to each other on the way to our next class. Then Adji asked me this question, “유가요, why is she angry with me?”

WHAT THE HECK. I upset Adji last week during English class so Adji wasn’t in a very good mood that Friday. 가요 had no idea why Adji was angry. But then days later, thinking Adji was still upset, 가요 didn’t greet her, and Adji thought it was strange so she asked her why she didn’t greet her. This made 가요 think Adji got mad at her and became afraid of her so she tried to avoid her by sitting next to me in this class. But then this made Adji think that 가요 was angry with her or something because usually 가요 sat next to her. LONG STORY SHORT, they thought the other person was mad at them so they started acting strange, but actually, it’s all just a misunderstanding.

When we got into our building, I told Adji I was going to buy a snack at GS25 so she accompanied me, while I was choosing ice cream, 유가요 entered the store and there, Adji confronted her. It was all a misunderstanding. 가요 didn’t want to fight her, and really, there isn’t any explaining to do, because they really aren’t mad at each other. When Adji was starting to raise her voice, and 가요 was trying to explain to her that it was all a misunderstanding, I just left the scene. I don’t know how to deal with this. In the end, we all just pretended that it never happened, and in the next “novel class” 가요 was back to sitting next to Adji–right where she belongs. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So, here’s the lesson, guys. Don’t assume things and whisper behind each other’s backs. Because what was never a problem, can actually become a problem.

So, what happened really made no sense…그게 말이 돼?

행복하자, 아프지말고




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